Your Partner And Fatherhood

During your pregnancy, you and your partner will start to think about your new roles as parents. So far you only have thought of each other as partners or lovers, but now you may be wondering if you will be a good mother or your partner a good father.

Involving Your Partner

Your partner may feel detached at the beginning of a pregnancy, because he has none of the signs or symptoms that, for you, make the pregnancy real. It is as if your partner needs something more tangible before he accepts the pregnancy.

You will not look any different and so, in some cases, it is only when he has seen ultrasounds scan of the baby, or heard the heart beat, that the reality will hit him. Although you may be feeling tired and nauseous, until you have an obvious, if small, bump or he feels the baby move; he may find it hard to accept that anything has changed.

Parenthood is a journey together and it can help to involve your partner from the start, getting him to accompany you to antenatal checks whenever possible. You may become so preoccupied with the pregnancy and growing baby that your partner feels pushed out and lonely.

He may have his own worries about becoming a father, so find tome when you can talk together about the way that you both feel. He may be anxious about providing financial security, particularly if you are planning to give up work, and so you need to plan together for the time ahead.

Changes in your relationship

Women often feel more sexual at certain times during pregnancy. It is normal to go off sex at times during your pregnancy, and you may find that your desire peaks and troughs over the 9 months. Some are reluctant to make love during pregnancy for fear of hurting the baby.

For most women, it is perfectly safe to have sex throughout their pregnancy, and your partner may need to be reassured that his penis is not affecting the baby. The arrival of baby will inevitably change your relationship in some way and, for some couples, it is important to spend some quality time together before they become a family. By attending antenatal classes with you, he will also get the opportunity to talk with other men about their feelings.

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